Our life group had great discussion this week about faith. Faith is synonymous with trust in God. Trusting that He is who He says He is and that He will do what He says He will do.
The last question for the evening was an encouragement to be intentional in our faith. The question was…What can you do to exercise intentional faith this week?
Immediately in my spirit, I heard “stop micromanaging your children.” I knew what God meant. Trust Me with your children. Gulp!
I can get myself stressed over both my kids but I have head-butting experiences with my youngest. She is most like me. Because I have trained my brain to think the worst of me…when I see anything even close to resembling “me” in Rachel, I just want to snuff it out! I have come to realize that I have this underlying fear that drives me to think if I don’t snuff out the parts of “me” in her then she just might turn out to be the “me” I don’t like.
The bad “me.”
This is the micromanaging that God was talking about. (**I am talking about unhealthy micromanaging…this is very different from setting healthy boundaries and guidelines for your children as a parent should.)
God is all about refining EVERY part of me. He refuses to leave a stone unturned!
The enemy is always trying to bury me under condemnation that I am a terrible mother…
”Look at the example you set for them just two years ago.”
“Look what you did…You’ve ruined them.”
“Because of your example, they will turn out just like you.”
THOSE ARE LIES! They are exposed. They have been purified by THE TRUTH.
God is changing my way of thinking about myself.
My kids are not me and they are not walking the road I’ve walked. They belong to Jesus. They love Jesus. I didn’t have that when I was their age.
And as far as what I did two years ago…our whole family has grown closer to the LORD and to each other because of His Mercy…How can that be? Because….
What the enemy meant for evil and my own foolish choice…God meant it for good. (Feel free to ask my girls what the LORD has done in our family…they will gladly tell you!)
My girls really are amazing…
Back to life group night…
During our prayer time, I repented for not trusting God with my children. I decided I would be intentional in my faith…that God could be trusted with my children.
God is so good to me. He loves me so much, I could just cry over it. His love is simply overwhelming.
Not only does He give me direction, instruction and discipline but then He will encourage me in it!
That same night, I came home from life group and Rachel asked me if I could come into her room because she had forgotten to tell me something earlier that was important and she wanted to tell me before she went to sleep.
She was in bed with the covers pulled up to her chin. Her smile was so sweet and her eyes sparkled as she told me of a girl that was drawn to her and wanted to speak to her privately at school. Her friend said that she wanted to get to know my daughter better because she knew she loved Jesus and some of the friends she currently hangs out with were not the best influence on her.
And then Rachel said the sweetest thing that I knew was a gift from God…
She said…”See Mommy? My light for Jesus is shining at school!”
I kissed her goodnight and got into my bed. Tears of repentance and joy wet my pillow as I thanked the LORD for His unfailing love towards me. He was rebuking me gently…stop micromanaging your children…
God loves them more than I ever could because His love is perfect. They are His girls first and a precious gift to me. I’m so blessed. I’m so glad I don’t have to parent without Him.
He doesn’t miss anything. Every detail of our lives matter to Him.
We can trust Him…with EVERYTHING…
Yep…even our children.