I enjoy social media. If we are friends, you know this about me. I like good, clean fun. I love the posts that really make me laugh. The ones that make me belly laugh are the ones I will repost. I love encouraging people with Scripture or a quote that made me think or stung my heart a little…or A LOT. I could do without all the copy and paste this to your timeline if you love Jesus posts because…well…let’s just leave it at that. I’m not a lover of political posts and arguing that stuff out on Facebook. And it grieves my heart when people air out their dirty laundry on Facebook.
Well, actually, some are not usually airing out THEIR dirty laundry. It is usually someone else’s or, at the very least, their perception of the other person’s dirty laundry.
Sometimes, I come across something that will make me hear brakes screeching in my head. It stops me in my tracks. This one didn’t just stop me, it punched me in the guts and knocked the wind out of me.
Clearly, I was having a moment. But I want to talk about it. Here is what I saw…
First things first…let me be clear. If you are reading this and you are the one of the ones who posted this message…I am not mad at you. It is clear to me that you have been hurt and I’m sorry for that…truly. And I do pray for you, that you would invite Jesus in to heal that hurt in you. He is the Only One who can. I do not make light of your pain.
Secondly, I have dealt with rejection most of my life, starting as a toddler. That rejection rooted in my heart and grew in ways I plan to talk about in future posts but, for the sake of time let’s just say, the end result was a young girl feeling unwanted and discarded…simply put – trash.
Thirdly, I cheated…as recently as three years ago. When the affair was discovered, it was very hard to not look at myself as trash and I fully expected my husband to do the same.
But he didn’t. Instead, he walked with me as we figured out what has made me live such a self-destructive life.
Now, I am not blind to the fact that this doesn’t happen in every marriage where there is adultery. That is not the point of this blog.
My point is NO ONE IS TRASH and NO ONE SHOULD BE CALLED TRASH. It is a lie from the enemy and I have believed that lie my whole life…until my eyes were opened to the truth.
Hurting people hurt people. I didn’t wake up one morning and decide I’m gonna hurt my husband and my children and all my friends and my church…just because I feel like it that day.
I had to be willing to face some really hard things about myself and I had to replace A LOT of lies with A LOT of truth to get to the point of believing that I’m not really trash.
Another reason I had to write a short little blurb on this is that, when I read that poster on Facebook, out of my mouth I said “I AM NOT TRASH!” I would never have defended that about myself just three short years ago.
Adultery is a sin…NO DOUBT ABOUT IT. It is never right in ANY situation. But God poured out His grace and mercy on me and He loves me and He has plenty of grace and mercy for you and you and that sinner…and that sinner…and that sinner and ….
Our sin does not make us trash but it will lead to death if we don’t confess and turn from our sins…all sin…including the one that you commit when you call someone trash.
I couldn’t possibly go into all the different situations and circumstances of every adultery case. The ripple effect of consequences that come from adultery can be devastating. For some, getting out is the best thing. For some, working out your marriage is the best thing.
Regardless, the truth is if a person believes they are trash, they will act like trash. They will do things that are destructive because they feel that they have no worth and they do not belong. They will look for things that will seemingly make them not feel like trash. They will find it hard to think God loves them because, well, they are trash and who wants trash?
People are not trash. They are made in the image of God and made to be in relationship with God. I can assure you that calling a person trash does not push them towards God. It just affirms in them what they already believe about themselves.
I praise Jesus that my husband was a vessel willing to be used by God to walk with me in understanding the truth about who God really is and what God really thinks of me. Was it easy? NOPE. Do I still struggle? Less and less.
I have surrounded myself with friends who can easily pick up on when I’m not thinking correctly about God by the things I say about myself or my situation. I’m so grateful for you.
For the person who is believing the lie that you are trash…that is not who you are…no matter what you’ve done. If you are breathing, there is hope. Repent and turn to God.
Romans 10:9-10 because, if you confess with your mouth that Jesus is Lord and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved. For with the heart one believes and is justified, and with the mouth one confesses and is saved.
For the Christian person who calls people trash…repent precious one…turn to God and pray for Him to give you the ability to see all people as souls worth saving. Thank Him for His grace and mercy towards you. Sometimes we need to be reminded of where we once were when we didn’t have Jesus.
Romans 5:8 But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us.
For the person who has been hurt by someone else’s sin, I’m so sorry. Turn to Jesus and allow Him to heal and comfort you. Ask God to give you the desire to WANT to forgive the person who has hurt you. If you don’t, unforgiveness will turn into a bitter root in your soul. That bitterness will spill over into every area of your life and leave your heart hard and cold.
Psalm 34:18 The Lord is near to the brokenhearted and saves the crushed in spirit.
I love you sweet peeps.